Jon Stewart commits bloody murder
Did You See Jon Stewart Kill Bill O’Reilly Last Night? No Really…
Stewart isn’t only leaving his show, he’s bringing his enemies with him. Following the “Obliteration of Crossfire” Jon one upped this feat by committing first degree murder on national television
With the recent announcement of his upcoming departure, it's clear Daily Showhost Jon Stewart is using his remaining days to get the last word on his predominantly conservative counterparts. No doubt you've seen him take on Fox News talking head Bill O'Reilly on both of their rivaling programs, and you are even more likely to have been aware of Rumble 2012, their widely sensationalized one off debate. But last night's Daily Show was a little more than a simple civil talk.
To phrase the events in the most matter-of-fact way possible: Jon Stewart killed Bill O'Reilly.
Starting off as a classic climate change debate Bill stated his usual case, regarding the cold winter not matching up with the term "warming" as we know it. The usually irreverent and comedic Stewart cast aside his satirical persona and took a drastically dark approach. Blow after blow fans cheered as Stewart eventually stepped out of his seat and made the man cease to be. By this I don't mean Stewart made a valid point, and I don't mean Stewart seemed to be more coherent and articulate than O'Reilly. What I'm trying to tell you is that the man took away his life.
Bill O'Reilly was murdered in front of a crowd that seated over 100 people.
The scene lasted 7 minutes. In classic mob mentality the crowd applauded and cheered in bloody horror as Stewart completely erased the identity of the former father of two. The news anchor was 65 years old.
It's a wonder the public eye has let the bloodthirsty funnyman enjoy a respected career when journalists have only blatantly told us of his countless murderous rampages. Over the years various news sources have reported Stewart being suspected of "Destroying Michelle Bachman" "Pimp Slapping Rupert Murdoch" and "Pillaging Sean Hannity's Village."
If you see Stewart please contact the authorities and don't attempt to converse with him. He is highly dangerous.